Life is a Long journey

I never really thought about this in much before and it never quite occurred to me but once you end School, it’s like work work work non-stop. You never really get a proper break till you retire. Early on in life you know that you have to finish kindergarten, then primary school, secondary school, tertiary school... then suddenly there isn’t any structure anymore and you don’t know where is the end point. If you’re suffering somewhere in some job, you don’t really know when it ends. So this was also my difficulty.

As a Christian it’s like we are here for this brief period of testing time and then we go to heaven when our body fails here. Again my stupid brain is asking whether I’ll fail any of the tests. (Not again brain)

Anyway my point is, the journey is a Long one. So don’t make any fast sprints and lose all the energy like I did in my previous job. Just chill and go slow and enjoy the journey as you go. It’s real good when you got someone to go with you. Thank you Lord for J. 

J got me this figurine for my birthday which I feel is a good reminder for me to just chill and enjoy life.

Weight loss journey post #1

I have been struggling with my weight for the last 3 years. I have had a lot of time in my hands to cook, bake and experiment and I've become a pretty good cook.

I notice that I like to cook whenever I feel bored because. I really like creating nice food with my hands and then what happens after cooking? I'll eat it. ALL OF IT!
I like to eat when I'm bored too. I feel hungry when I'm bored and I just want to eat something nice and sweet or sometimes even savoury. Somehow some dopamines or something are set off in my brain which makes me feel happy and comforted when I eat.

I'm going to use a new tactic on myself. I'm gonna ask myself
"Are you TRULY hungry or is it some mouth craving?"

If it's a mouth craving, I'm going to try to solve it by having some fruit or floral tea.
I just got two boxes of tea from T2. The fruitalicious one which smells fantastic, and the sleep one. Which has chamomile and peppermint. chamomile helps me feel less anxious and relaxes me.

It's a little sour but it's possibly because I leave it in long enough

Loose leaf  looks so pretty with those rose and lavender petals

I really love T2 and the great thing is that there is one at 313 sommerset!

Ok so i'm gonna try this tea thing and see how it goes.
btw, i'm like 78kg now. yes that's really heavy and I can't believe I'm telling the internet.
My goal is to lose 10 kg by Christmas.
So that's about one kilo a month. I'll let you know all my hopes and goals in the next post.
Right now, every gram loss counts and even if I mess up and eat too much for one meal, I shouldn't feel like a failure and just scrap the whole diet. Mess up one time, try to make sure I don't the next time. I CAN DO THIS!

It’s been a Long time

So much has happened since I’ve last blogged.

I am older. Less cheerful about the world.

Made some mistakes, gained some experience.

Met the man I’m gonna marry.

Decided to start writing again. This time with a purpose. To let people who feel like they are losers and failures know that they are not alone.
Fellow failure here!!

So my big story on failure:

I love helping people and so I enrolled myself in a masters of counselling course all the way in Melbourne. Left my comfortable home where my helpers do all my stuff for me, left my big loving family, my then quite stable but boring Boyfriend (we ended up breaking up), left my pug Kenji...
 Went to Melbourne met loads of great friends, the love of my life, got my masters...

Came back to Singapore, got a job at a place I always wanted to work at. Couldn’t take the pressures of the job. Left the job.

Now I’m back at the start. Or not. I got a lot of knowledge on counselling but lost the confidence to do anything related to it. Can’t deal with the emotional baggage it comes with.
I’m back in Melbourne now taking some time to figure things out.
I know I like helping people, I like coaching, teaching...

I’m gonna keep trying. If I can’t counsel now, i will teach maybe. Maybe one day I would make a better counsellor?
I’m gonna move one foot in front of the other and I’ll end up somewhere someday.

Even if the step is one cm, it’s still moving forward. Lol.